Extreme Ghostbusters Virtual Season Episode 9 - Book Smarts
by J-R Virtual Seasons
Summary: July 1998: Roland has something on his mind, and has been distant and distracted. When he tries to think things through to a conclusion, the process leads to some alarming changes that have his friends seriously worried.
1. Chapter 1

At a recently renovated theatre somewhere near Broadway, the Ghostbusters were chasing the ghost of an opera singer around the auditorium.

'I've got her!' Garrett declared, just before shooting down a large chandelier as the ghost flew from one side of the ceiling to the other.

'Oh my, oh my!' twittered the uptight theatre owner. 'We're supposed to be opening tonight – I'll never get all that glass cleared up in time!'

'You're gonna have bigger problems than that if we don't catch this ghost before you open,' Eduardo predicted.

'Yes, I know... but can't you do it without destroying my whole theatre?' said the owner.

'No promises, man,' said Eduardo, as he shot a proton beam into the rafters and blasted a floodlight to smithereens.

'Oh dear, oh dear!' fretted the owner.

'It's okay, guys!' Kylie's voice wafted down from the balcony seating area above. 'I've got her!'

Sure enough, a proton beam shot from the upper level and fixed onto the ghost, which started writhing and screaming in distress.

'Roland,' Kylie called, 'how about another stream on her?'

No reply was forthcoming; nor was a second stream. Kylie turned her gaze away from the ghost, whereupon a deafening bout of shrill opera singing assaulted her ears and she fell backwards over a row of seating, cutting off her proton stream in the process.

'You will never oust me from this theatre!' the ghost sang aggressively. 'I am the star turn here – I always have been and I always will be! There will be no grand reopening until I am given top billing!'

As the ghost spoke, Garrett and Eduardo arrived on the upper level. While Eduardo helped Kylie back onto her feet, Garrett aimed his proton blaster at the ghost.

'Put a cork in it, Brunhilda!' he taunted the spectre. 'You've just been demoted to understudy.'

With that, Garrett trapped the ghost in a containment stream. Eduardo quickly backed him up with a second stream, and Kylie opened the ghost trap. A few seconds later, the singing ghost was sucked into the containment vortex.

'I never liked opera anyway,' said Garrett, picking up the smoking trap. 'She's gonna drive the other spooks in the containment unit crazy with all that caterwauling.'

'Talk about adding insult to incarceration,' said Kylie, allowing herself a small smile of amusement.

'Well done, guys,' said Roland, suddenly appearing from the other end of the balcony. 'Nice catch.'

'Thanks,' said Eduardo, 'but where were you when Kylie needed you, huh? You were supposed to be backing each other up.'

'I know,' Roland said flatly. 'I'm sorry; I got distracted.'

'By what?' asked Kylie. 'Anything we should know about? Another ghost, maybe?'

'No, it was... it was nothing,' Roland shrugged. 'I took my eye off the ball. It won't happen again.'

With that, he turned on his heel and started heading back down to the auditorium. The other three exchanged looks of confusion and concern.

'Is it just me, or is Roland acting kind of _loco_?' said Eduardo.

'It's not just you,' said Kylie.

'You think maybe he's possessed or something?' said Garrett.

'I don't know... he could be, I guess,' Kylie said.

'He seems more bummed than possessed to me,' said Eduardo.

'Maybe he's both,' said Garrett.

'We'll keep a close eye on him,' said Kylie, 'just in case.'

They followed Roland down to the lower level of the theatre.

* * *

Back at the firehouse, Eduardo had spread himself out on the couch and was reading a book with close scrutiny. Garrett and Kylie entered the room. Upon seeing what Eduardo was doing, they exchanged a glance.

'What're you reading this time, Eduardo?' Kylie asked casually.

' _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_ ,' said Eduardo, nonchalantly flicking over a page.

'Taking a break from the heavy stuff, huh?' said Kylie. 'But isn't that kind of a kids' book?'

'Just because a book is aimed at kids, doesn't mean it's not worth reading, especially for a Ghostbuster!' Eduardo shot back. 'Remember J.N. Kline? Besides, this isn't just _any_ old copy of _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_. Didn't you see the cover? It's the adult edition, printed in Canada!'

'But it has exactly the same text as the kids' edition, right?' said Kylie.

'Yeah,' said Eduardo.

'If it's gonna call itself the adult edition, it should have some more adult scenes in it,' Garrett grinned. 'Like, maybe, Harry and Hermione share a bit more than a hug before he goes to face Professor Quirrell, you know what I'm saying?'

'Come on, man, they're like twelve years old!' said Eduardo. 'Plus I don't think their relationship is like that, anyways. Hermione is, like, Harry's best friend.'

'I thought Ron was Harry's best friend,' said Kylie.

'Huh!' said Eduardo. 'Ron don't seem like a very good friend to me!'

'Ron is a putz,' said Garrett.

'The dude has a load of issues with his family that he really needs to deal with,' said Eduardo. 'It's not healthy to leave stuff like that to fester.'

'Well, maybe there's more to _Harry Potter_ than I thought,' said Kylie. 'I'm sorry I teased you, Eduardo. But I didn't realise you liked it too, Garrett.'

'Me?' said Garrett. 'I don't like _Harry Potter_! Well, it's okay, I guess... for a kids' book.'

'Have you read the new book, _The Chamber of Secrets_?' asked Eduardo. 'It's even better than the first one.'

'Get out of town, it can't be!' said Garrett. 'Um, that is... no, I haven't read it yet.'

At that moment, Roland entered the room. Garrett used the opportunity to deflect the conversation away from himself.

'What about you, Rolster?' he asked. 'Are you a _Harry Potter_ fanboy like Eddie here?'

'Huh?' said Roland, seemingly coming out of a daze. 'Am I what?'

'Do... you... like... _Harry Potter_?' Garrett asked, deliberately slowly.

'Oh... I don't know,' Roland shrugged. 'Casey loves it, but I haven't read it myself.'

'You should, man,' said Eduardo. 'It's really good.'

'Yeah, well... I don't know, maybe later,' Roland said distractedly. 'Excuse me, I... I have to go do something.'

With that, Roland wandered out of the room like a sleepwalker.

'I'm telling you, he's possessed!' said Garrett.

'I still think he's just bummed,' said Eduardo.

'Why don't you go talk to him, Kylie?' Garrett suggested.

'Me?' said Kylie. 'Why me?'

'I dunno, 'cause girls are good at talking, I guess,' Garrett shrugged. 'Besides, you're his friend, aren't you?'

'Oh, and you guys aren't?' Kylie riposted.

'Yeah, we are, but... well, you know,' said Garrett. 'Go on, Kylie – ask the big guy what's bugging him.'

'Okay, I will,' said Kylie, setting off after Roland. 'But because I care about him – not because you told me to, Garrett!'

* * *

Kylie found Roland in the kitchen, holding the door of the fridge open and staring into it with a glassy expression on his face.

'Trying to add a few dollars to the electric bill, huh?' said Kylie, leaning casually against the counter beside the fridge.

'Huh?' said Roland. 'Oh... no, I was just getting myself... um, a soda.'

He did so, and went to sit down at the table. Kylie watched him carefully as he performed this quick and simple sequence of events.

'Why are you staring at me?' asked Roland.

'I'm wondering what's wrong with you,' said Kylie. 'We all are.'

'There's nothing wrong with me,' Roland shrugged.

'Don't give me that,' said Kylie, taking a seat opposite him at the table. 'You're distant and distracted and we've all noticed. Garrett thinks you're possessed and Eduardo thinks you're bummed.'

'And what do you think, Kylie?' said Roland.

'I'm on the fence,' Kylie told him flatly. 'So, which is it?'

'Well... it's neither, really,' said Roland. 'I guess Eduardo's assessment is pretty close, but I'm not really bummed so much as... thoughtful, I guess.'

'You're not possessed, then?'

'Definitely not.'

'You're thoughtful?'

'Yes. Y'know, as in ruminative – considering something important.'

'I see,' said Kylie. 'Although if you _were_ possessed, you might not want me to find out and so you'd tell me that you'd got something important on your mind, wouldn't you?'

'Yeah, I guess I would,' said Roland, smiling slightly. 'Okay, I'll tell you what I'm thinking about and you see if it rings true.'

'Okay.'

'On the last day of the semester, Professor Banks called me into his office and showed me something.'

'Are you sure you shouldn't be telling this to the police instead of me?' Kylie asked, one corner of her mouth rising in amusement.

'I can't tell you this if you're gonna make jokes,' Roland frowned.

'Okay, I'm sorry,' said Kylie. 'Go ahead, tell me.'

'Well, he showed me a letter from Stanford University.'

'In California?'

'Yeah. I've been accepted on a four-year Engineering doctorate. I can start in September if I want to.'

'Oh, well, congratulations,' said Kylie. 'Stanford's pretty hard to get into, isn't it?'

'Yes,' said Roland. 'That's why I never thought they'd take me when Professor Banks suggested I apply for a transfer, so I let him go ahead and send off the paperwork. But they did take me... and I have to accept or reject the place by the end of the week.'

'And this important decision that's constantly on your mind,' said Kylie, 'is which of those two options you're gonna choose, right?'

'Right,' said Roland. 'On the one hand, I should definitely accept. Like you said, Stanford is a prestigious university and I'd be crazy to turn down a place there. I've always wanted to further my studies, and this course gives me the chance to become a doctor of engineering in four years.'

'Being a doctor is something you've always wanted too, isn't it?' said Kylie.

'Yes... but I never thought I'd get the chance to work toward it so soon, or so quickly,' said Roland. 'I should be jumping at the chance, but...'

'But California is a very long way away,' said Kylie. 'You'd be leaving the only home you've ever known, and your family with it. You'd have to retire as a Ghostbuster too... or at least take an indefinite sabbatical.'

'Exactly,' said Roland, 'although I'm not sure anyone would really notice if I stopped being a Ghostbuster!'

'Of course we would, Roland,' said Kylie. 'You're like the lynchpin of the team – I know we take you for granted sometimes, but we'd all fall apart without you to keep us grounded!'

'I know my family would miss me if I left,' Roland sighed, 'and I'd miss them. Besides, I'd be letting them down – who'd pick Casey up from soccer practice when Mom's on the late shift?'

'If you stay because of your family, it can't be because you feel obligated to do stuff for them,' Kylie advised. 'It has to be because you... well, because you want to stay with them.'

'I do want that,' said Roland. 'But it's not like I'd never see them again if I went, and I have to leave home sometime, don't I?'

'No, not if you don't want to,' Kylie shrugged.

'You wanted to,' said Roland. 'You haven't lived with either of your parents for years!'

'Yeah, but we're not talking about me,' Kylie pointed out. 'We're talking about you, remember? You have to do what you want to do – what feels right for you. Have you talked to your family about it?'

'A little,' said Roland. 'My dad says I'd be crazy not to go and my mom says I should do what I think is best.'

'Your mom's right,' said Kylie. 'Roland, you've got good reasons to go and good reasons to stay – you just have to decide which reasons are more important to you.'

'I wish I could be as sure of making the right choice for myself as you obviously are.'

'I've never really been sure of anything. But I've always made decisions about my life that feel right for me, so I know I'll never look back and regret any of them because I know I felt they were the right things at the time.'

'But I don't know which is the right thing!' Roland complained. 'To put it simply, my head says go but my heart says no!'

'Then pick one to listen to,' Kylie advised. 'Whichever decision you make will be the right thing – there isn't a wrong one.'

'Man, I wish I could see it like that,' Roland sighed. 'And... and what if I'm not good enough, huh? What if I go to Stanford and I can't cope with the coursework? It's not really meant for our age group, you know. What if I don't have enough knowledge and experience yet?'

'Then you come back to New York and try again when you're ready.'

'But what if Stanford won't ever have me back?'

'Then you apply for another course somewhere other than Stanford.'

'Then I won't have a doctorate from Stanford!'

'Is that what you really want from all this?'

'I don't know!' Roland wailed, dropping his head onto the table. 'I don't know anything! Now can you see why I've been so distracted lately?'

'Yes, I can,' said Kylie. 'Look, Roland, if you want to find out whether you can cope with the coursework, why don't you read up on it? Was there a book list with the letter?'

'Yes.'

'Okay, so go to the library and see what you'd be letting yourself in for. As they say, forewarned is forearmed. Do some reading, see how you feel – it might make your decision easier, one way or the other. Besides, it's certainly something you need to take into account when you do make the choice.'

'Yeah,' said Roland. 'Yeah, you're right. Thanks, Kylie – I'll go to the library tomorrow.'

'No – go now,' Kylie advised. 'We can cope without you... but we _will_ notice that you're not here!'

'Okay,' Roland laughed. 'You're right again – I'll go now.'

'Do you mind if I tell the others where you've gone and why?' asked Kylie. 'They really are worried about you, y'know.'

'Yeah, sure, you can tell them,' said Roland, rising to his feet. 'Thanks, Kylie... for everything. I'll see you later.'

He left the kitchen.

* * *

'You mean you don't have _any_ of them?' Roland asked in disbelief, allowing the book list to hang limply at his side.

'That is correct,' the snooty old librarian sniffed at him. 'Sorry.'

'And you call this a public library!' said Roland. 'How can you not have any books on commercial engineering?'

'We have plenty of books on commercial engineering,' the librarian bristled. 'We just don't have any of the ones on your list.'

'This is unbelievable,' Roland muttered. 'Could you check again, please?'

'All right,' the librarian said with bad grace. 'Let me see the list again.'

Roland handed it over. The librarian glanced back and forth between the list and the screen of her computer, tapping away at the keyboard from time to time. Roland fixed her with an annoyed and impatient look.

'Ah yes, here's something,' the librarian said at length. 'Tell me, young man – of all the books on this list, which one do you most want to get hold of?'

'I don't know – the first one, I guess,' Roland shrugged. 'The one about an introduction to commercial engineering or whatever it's called.'

' _An Introduction to Engineering in the Commercial Sector_ by Professor G. Gaubert, nineteen seventy-nine,' said the librarian. 'Yes, that's the one.'

'Are you telling me you do have a copy of it?' asked Roland.

'Yes – we have just one copy of that particular volume, and luckily for you it's not out on loan at the moment,' said the librarian. 'Look under General Reference, Dewey Decimal number one thousand point four two.'

'I thought the Dewey Decimal system only went up to nine hundred and ninety-nine point whatever,' said Roland.

'You thought wrong then, didn't you?' said the librarian. 'Hurry and find the book, before somebody else borrows it.'

'All right, I'm going,' said Roland. 'Thanks a lot for all your _help_.'

'Don't mention it, young man,' said the librarian. 'That's exactly what I'm here for.'

Roland found the section of nine hundreds in the General Reference section. Sure enough, the very last book on the shelf was labelled one thousand point four two.

' _An Introduction to Engineering in the Commercial Sector_ ,' Roland read off the spine. 'Well, I guess it's a start.'

He plucked the book from the shelf and turned his steps back towards the front desk.

* * *

Night had fallen. At the firehouse, Egon entered the lounge and turned on the ceiling light. Roland looked up from his book, which he was reading on the couch.

'You'll damage your eyes if you read without sufficient light,' Egon told him.

'Oh, yeah, I guess I didn't realise how late it's getting,' said Roland. 'You don't mind if I hang around here a little longer, do you? I won't be able to sit and finish this book in peace if I go home.'

'You're welcome to stay as long as you want,' said Egon, 'but you're not planning on reading the whole book in one go, are you?'

'Yes, if I can manage it,' said Roland. 'I'm about halfway through already.'

'How's it going?' asked Egon.

'Fine,' said Roland, with false brightness. 'Well, actually, maybe not _totally_ fine, if I'm honest... I don't really understand all of it... but it sure is interesting.'

'Is there any point in staying up all night reading the thing if you don't understand it?' asked Egon.

'I do understand it!' Roland said defensively. 'Well, some of it... well, a couple of bits... maybe.'

'It's much more advanced than anything you've studied before, isn't it?' said Egon. 'Clearly you have an incredible gift for mechanics and engineering, Roland – the fact that we still have functioning ghostbusting equipment is testament to that, for one thing – but that doesn't necessarily mean you're ready to plough straight into a doctorate on the subject, does it?'

'So what're you saying, Egon?' asked Roland. 'Are you telling me I shouldn't go to Stanford?'

'I'm not telling you anything, Roland,' said Egon.

'You did a bunch of degrees and stuff before you were really old enough, didn't you?' said Roland. 'Are you saying you'd advise someone like me not to do the same thing?'

'Someone like you?' said Egon. 'There's no one like you, Roland – there's no one like anybody. We're all unique individuals, and we have to make the right choices for ourselves.'

'Okay, so do you think you made the wrong choices when you were my age?'

'No, I don't think that. But there are pros and cons to every situation, Roland – you just have to make sure you've weighed them all up for yourself.'

Roland opened his mouth to reply, and then closed it again. He looked down at the page in front of him for a few seconds, then he looked back up at Egon.

'Everyone keeps telling me I have to do what's right for me,' he said. 'To be honest with you, Egon, I'm starting to wonder whether commercial engineering is right for me at all! I mean, there are other things I could study, aren't there? I don't _have_ to do this. I don't _have_ to be a doctor, do I?'

'No, not at all,' said Egon. 'And you certainly don't have to be one four years from now – you have plenty of time for that. But if you really want my advice, I don't think you should make any decision either way based on your reaction to a single textbook.'

Roland laughed slightly, and nodded. Egon started to retrace his steps out of the room.

'I'll let you get back to your reading,' he said. 'Feel free to use the landline if you want to call home for anything. I'll be in the lab if you want me.'

* * *

Roland woke up with a start as his floppy hands lost their grip on the heavy textbook and it smacked down onto his face. He pulled himself up into a sitting position.

'Man,' he muttered, 'maybe I should call it a night.'

'You can't go yet. We're just getting started.'

There was no doubt about it – the weird, quavering voice had come from the book. As Roland watched in surprise, a cloud of blue vapour rose from between the pages and formed into the shape of a human face with a small beard and a pair of horn-rimmed glasses.

'I have so much more to teach you, Roland,' the apparition said. 'Stay awhile, and let's talk.'

'What... who are you?' asked Roland.

'Why, Professor G. Gaubert, of course,' said the strange blue face. 'Preserved between the pages of my book, just as all great writers are ever destined to be.'

'You're a ghost, then?'

'Well, you're not going to hold that against me, are you? You're not going to bust me, when there's so much I can tell you... so much I can do for you?'

'Why would you want to do anything for me?'

'Because you remind me of myself, Roland. You have the potential to be the greatest engineer the world has ever known, but you are plagued by self-doubt. I was once like you, but then look where I ended up – my magnum opus is now top of the reading list for the country's most prestigious engineering doctorate!'

'So... how are you going to help me?' asked Roland. 'Can you explain the parts of the book I don't understand?'

'Of course I can do that for you, Roland,' said the spectre. 'That, and so much more.'

'You want to help me with my education?'

'Yes... but that's only for starters. In death, there are no secrets. We see all... hear all... know all... and feel all. What would you like to feel, Roland, that you've never felt before?'

'Um, well... perhaps there are a couple of things,' Roland admitted sheepishly.

'Of course there are,' said the entity. 'It's only natural that there should be. Take me with you to California, Roland, and you will know all you need to know... and feel all you want to feel.'

'But I... I don't think I can.'

'I see. Not got the stomach for it, eh?'

'No, it's not that,' said Roland. 'It's just that you're a library book – I have to return you in two weeks.'

'There are ways around that,' said the apparition. 'Just tell me we're partners, Roland, and everything will fall into place from there.'

Roland opened his mouth to reply but before he could say anything, a blinding white light filled the room and he had to shield his eyes. He heard screams and curses from the entity followed by a metallic clang. He opened his eyes to see Egon approaching him, a closed ghost trap in his hands. Slimer was floating alongside.

'Perhaps I shouldn't have done that,' said Egon. 'Perhaps I was interfering. But I've done it now.'

'You don't think that ghost was trustworthy?' asked Roland.

'I think anything that seems too good to be true is probably exactly that,' said Egon. 'You don't need the help of a haunted book to achieve your goals, Roland – you can do that by yourself.'

Roland laughed ruefully, and looked down into his lap. 'Can I?'

'Well, I suppose that's for you to decide,' said Egon. 'I'll leave the trap with you – you can take it down to the containment unit when you're ready.'

With that, Egon left the room again. Slimer decided to stay, and came to hover near Roland's face. Roland turned away slightly.

'Wanna talk about it?' Slimer asked hopefully.

'Huh?' said Roland. 'Oh... no thanks, Slimer.'

'Are you sure?' Slimer asked coaxingly.

'I've just been given some advice from beyond the grave, but Egon seems to think I shouldn't listen to it,' said Roland. 'No offence, Slimer, but maybe ghosts aren't really the best life coaches, seeing as they aren't alive themselves.'

Slimer adopted an extremely hurt expression, and Roland looked instantly guilty.

'Sorry, that was insensitive of me,' Roland said awkwardly. 'I should just be glad to have a friend like you who really cares about me, even if you're not alive. And that doesn't mean I should totally discount you as a source of advice. I mean, you were alive once, weren't you?'

'Yeah,' said Slimer.

'And you probably have lots of life experiences to draw on, don't you?'

'Maybe. I don't remember.'

'You don't remember what it's like to be alive?'

'Not really. Not properly.'

Roland held back for a few seconds, but then gave in and asked the question he was longing to ask. 'Do you remember what it's like to die?'

'Yes,' said Slimer, a dark look crossing his face for a moment. 'Yes, I remember that.'

'Can you... can you describe it to me?'

Slimer shrugged and fixed Roland with an uncomfortable expression.

'I'm sorry, Slimer,' said Roland, 'I shouldn't have asked you that.'

'It's okay, Roland,' said Slimer. 'I want to tell you, but... but...'

'But you don't have the words, right?' said Roland. 'And you probably wouldn't have them even if you could still speak like... well, like you did when you were alive?'

Slimer nodded. 'Pretty much.'

'I'm really sorry,' said Roland. 'It was wrong of me to push you like I did. It's just that... well, it's just that Professor Gaubert made his particular brand of death sound so attractive... so much knowledge... so much power...'

'You should be careful, Roland,' Slimer advised. 'Never trust something that thinks for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain.'

'Oh yeah?' Roland laughed. 'Where did you get that piece of wisdom from?'

'Eduardo,' said Slimer.

'Hmm, well, Professor Gaubert had a head... I mean, he _was_ a head... so I _did_ see where he keeps his brain!'

'It wasn't a head – just a face.'

'Yeah, well, I don't think I'm desperate enough yet to take Eduardo's advice!'

'Why not?' asked Slimer. 'At least he's alive, right?'

'I'm losing a battle of wits with a ghost,' Roland sighed. 'I think I'd better call it a night. Thanks for the talk, Slimer. And I'm... y'know, sorry.'

'It's okay, Roland,' said Slimer.

'Tell Egon I've gone home, will you?'

'Okay. You gonna empty the trap first?'

'Um... not right now,' said Roland. 'I'll do it later.'

With that, Roland picked up the book and the ghost trap, found his car keys and left the firehouse.


	2. Chapter 2

A few days later, the Ecto-1 pulled in to the firehouse and came to a stop. Egon, Eduardo, Kylie and Garrett decamped from the vehicle.

'I'm gonna put this guy on ice,' said Eduardo, holding a steaming ghost trap at arm's length.

'Man, that's the third call Roland's missed in two days,' said Garrett. 'Where's he been hiding lately?'

'Maybe he just needs some time to himself,' said Kylie. 'He's got a lot of thinking to do.'

'I just hope that's all he's doing,' Egon muttered.

'Hey, guys. What's going on?'

Everyone whirled around to see Roland silhouetted in the open doorway. He had one arm around a curvaceous young woman, while the other was clutching a familiar textbook to his chest.

'I'll tell you what's going on,' said Garrett. 'You weren't around when we needed you, _again_!'

'Sorry, I was busy,' said Roland. 'No biggie, right? Hey, baby, you'd better split now. I'll see you later, okay?'

'So you _will_ come to dinner with my parents tonight, then?' Roland's companion asked him, somewhat tersely.

'Yeah, yeah, sure I will,' Roland replied dismissively. 'And afterward maybe we can...'

He cupped a hand over his mouth and whispered in the girl's ear. Her expression darkened, before she slapped him around the face and flounced off down the street. Roland regained his composure to see that Kylie, Garrett and Egon were all staring at him in the utmost surprise.

'She'll come crawling back,' Roland predicted. 'She's crazy about me.'

'Oh, well... we're pleased for you, Roland,' said Kylie.

'You could've introduced us to her, though,' said Garrett. 'What's her name?'

'Oh, I don't know,' Roland shrugged. 'T'Keysha or T'Meyah or K'Deysha or something. Say, is there any food around here? I'm starving.'

He set off towards the kitchen, the book still clasped tightly to his chest.

'What's gotten into him?' said Garrett. 'He's acting really weird. I mean, he's Roland... but he's _not_ Roland!'

'Well, at least he's not depressed anymore,' said Kylie.

'It's that book,' Egon sighed. 'Roland must've released the entity I trapped, and now it's having some strange effect on him. I wish I'd put it in the containment unit myself now.'

'You were right to let him make the choice for himself, Egon,' said Kylie. 'He just seems to have made the wrong one this time.'

'Aha, I knew he was possessed!' Garrett crowed triumphantly.

'I don't think he's actually possessed,' said Egon, 'but clearly his association with this entity – this Professor Gerald Gaubert – is somehow causing the change in him.'

'Are we sure it's such a bad change?' asked Garrett. 'I mean, he has a girlfriend now and he seems really confident in himself.'

'Come on, Garrett – you saw how he was treating that girl,' said Kylie. 'Plus, like you said, he's been failing in his duties as a Ghostbuster. That's not our Roland who's just gone off to the kitchen... and we need our Roland back!'

'Then let's get to work on that at once,' said Egon. 'You two find Eduardo and go to the library; see if you can find out what they know about this haunted book.'

'What's the title?' asked Kylie.

'Roland left his reading list here the other night,' said Egon, producing the crumpled paper from a drawer in the reception desk. 'I think it's the book at the top of the list, but get them to check every title by this Professor Gaubert character just in case.'

'What should we ask them to check, exactly?' asked Garrett, taking the list from Egon.

'Whether they have the books in stock, and whether there have ever been any reports about their being haunted,' said Egon. 'In the meantime, I'm going to get on the internet and see what I can find out about our friend Gerald Gaubert.'

'You think he might've been some kind of nut?' asked Garrett.

'As he seems to have left part of himself in a book, I shouldn't be surprised to discover something of the sort,' said Egon.

* * *

'The lightning storm is expected to work its way up the eastern seaboard during the afternoon, passing over New York at about five o'clock before it moves over the Atlantic Ocean,' said the TV weather reporter. 'High winds and strong rain are expected, with possible localised travel disruption. And now for the pollen count...'

Roland switched off the television and turned to face the shimmering blue entity that was emanating from the book on the table beside him.

'Just like the internet forecast said,' said Roland. 'It's almost time.'

'Wonderful,' grinned the entity. 'Now, we must make haste. How long will it take to reach the building you spoke of?'

'Depends on the traffic,' said Roland. 'Shouldn't be too bad at this time of day.'

'We must go now,' said the entity. 'There is no time for delay.'

'Aren't you going to explain that chapter on biotechnical engineering principles first?' asked Roland. 'And what about my date tonight, huh? You're supposed to tell me what to say to impress, um... man, I just can't remember her name!'

'There'll be time for all that later!' the entity said impatiently. 'The storm is coming. Your friends are already suspicious. We must press ahead with the plan. We must do it now.'

'Whatever you say, Master,' said Roland.

'Yes,' chuckled the apparition, 'whatever I say!'

* * *

As they approached the firehouse, Eduardo, Garrett and Kylie were almost mown down by Roland's Mustang as it screeched out of the front doors.

'Man, where's Roland going in such a hurry?' said Eduardo, watching the car disappear along the street.

'Maybe he's off to make up with his girlfriend,' said Garrett.

'You're obsessed with his girlfriend, man,' said Eduardo. 'Are you jealous or something?'

'Puh-lease!' Garrett scoffed. 'I am _not_ jealous, okay? Seems to me like you're the one who should be jealous of Roland, Eddie, seeing as he can just go ahead and tell a girl when he likes her!'

'Hey, it was the crazy evil book that made him do that!' Eduardo shot back.

'Maybe not,' said Garrett. 'Maybe he's been going out with her for months and he just hasn't felt like telling us!'

'If that was the case, I think he'd know her name by now,' said Kylie, smiling slightly. 'Now, come on – this conversation isn't doing anyone any good. Let's make our report to Egon.'

She led the way into the firehouse with Garrett and Eduardo tailing behind, casting each other disgruntled looks. They found Egon in his lab, tapping away at the computer.

'Egon,' said Kylie, 'you'll never believe this, but they don't carry any of Professor Gerald Gaubert's books at that library and they never have!'

'Oh, I believe it,' Egon assured her, looking up from the computer screen. 'I'm afraid this situation could be very much worse than I'd even begun to imagine.'

'What did you find out, Egon?' asked Garrett. 'Was this Professor Gaubert character some kind of nutcase like we thought?'

'Professor Gerald Gaubert _wasn't_ anything,' said Egon. 'He _is_ alive and well and living in Florida.'

'But... but if he's not dead,' said Eduardo, 'then how can his ghost be living in a book?'

'It can't,' said Egon. 'It's still possible that Professor Gaubert put some kind of spell on the book to retain some part of himself inside it even though he's still alive, but there's a far more alarming – and, I'm afraid, far more likely – explanation.'

'You mean some kind of demon might be using the book to manipulate some hapless reader into channelling it into our world or something?' said Kylie.

'If pressed, I'd judge that to be the most likely scenario,' Egon sighed, removing his glasses and rubbing his eyes. 'I suspect that this entity is feeding off Roland's life energy in some way in order to achieve whatever it wants to achieve... and yes, that's most likely to enter our world and cause some trouble, if past experience of this kind of thing is anything to go by.'

'You mean the book is sucking out Roland's soul?' asked Garrett.

'No... well, yes, I suppose it could be,' said Egon. 'It's obviously feeding off him in some way, at any rate.'

'So wherever he's just driven off to at five hundred miles an hour,' said Eduardo, 'it can't be good news, right?'

'Right,' said Egon. 'Oh dear; this could be bad.'

'We have no way of knowing what he's planning to do!' said Kylie. 'How are we gonna help him now?'

Garrett adopted a ruminative expression, propelled himself into the kitchen, and returned a few seconds later with a small metallic item on his lap.

'Bingo!' he grinned. 'Roland left his electronic organiser in the kitchen – I've often seen it lying around in there. This should tell us what he's up to.'

'Come on, man!' Eduardo scoffed. 'Do you really think he's got something like "4pm, go to Battery Park and summon my new book demon buddy into our world" written in there?'

'Hey, it's got to be worth a look,' said Garrett. 'Let's see here... ah, no, he hasn't entered anything into the planner for the past three days!'

'That just proves once and for all that he's possessed,' said Kylie.

'I'll take a look in the General Notes section,' said Garrett. 'Ah, yes, jackpot!'

'What does it say?' asked Eduardo.

'Professor G – E.S.,' Garrett read off the screen.

'Yeah, that's real helpful,' Eduardo said flatly.

'We could at least try to work out what it stands for!' said Garrett. 'Eat spinach? End suffering? Enjoy Superman?'

'I doubt the demon wants to do any of that stuff,' said Kylie.

'Maybe E.S. is a person,' said Egon. 'Or a place.'

'Yeah, it could be the place he's just driven off to!' said Garrett. 'Do we know anywhere in New York it could be?'

'East River?' Eduardo suggested. 'Are you sure it's an S, not an R?'

'Yes, I'm sure – I know how to read!' said Garrett.

There followed a few moments of tense silence during which the non-existent sound of everyone wracking their brains could almost be heard.

'Ooh, I got one!' Kylie declared. 'Empire State!'

'Of course,' said Egon, 'the Empire State Building – the only possible explanation!'

'What, you think Roland's about to pull a King Kong or something?' said Garrett.

'I don't know what he's about to do,' said Egon, rising to his feet, 'but I think we'd better go and find out!'

* * *

The Ecto-1 screeched to a halt outside the Empire State Building with lights blazing and sirens blaring. Egon, Eduardo, Garrett and Kylie tumbled out of the vehicle, fully outfitted and equipped for ghostbusting. Lightning flashed in the sky above as a torrent of rain began to descend on the city.

'Do you really think Roland's here?' asked Kylie.

'I'd be surprised if he's not,' said Egon.

'At least he's not really scaling the walls,' Garrett remarked.

'We'll try the observation deck first,' Egon ordered.

'Great idea,' said Garrett. 'I vote we take the elevator.'

* * *

A couple of minutes later, the elevator arrived at the observation deck and Egon led the way out. Everyone looked around, and then Eduardo looked up.

'There he is!' Eduardo announced.

'What the heck does he think he's doing?' said Garrett.

'He's probably not thinking at all at this point,' Egon said ruefully. 'That's the problem.'

Roland was clinging to the enormous spire above, his feet planted precariously at the base. The textbook was tucked under one arm, while the shimmering blue strands that emanated from it coiled themselves around the spire in the shape of a corkscrew.

'Roland, get down from there!' Kylie yelled up to him.

'What are you doing, man?' Eduardo added.

'I... I serve my master!' Roland yelled back, the rain lashing his demented face. 'He will break through... he will conquer all!'

'Mmm, yes, things are very much as we feared, it seems,' Egon remarked.

'But why he is clinging onto the spire of the Empire State Building?' Garrett asked.

'What you see up there is the biggest lightning rod on the eastern seaboard,' said Egon. 'Presumably this entity is planning to harness the power of the storm and use it to cross into our dimension.'

'So... so what'll happen to Roland if the spire gets struck by lightning?' said Eduardo.

'What do you think?' said Egon.

'He'll be fried!' said Kylie.

'Yeah,' said Garrett, 'you don't need to be an expert to figure that one out.'

'We have to get him down from there!' said Kylie.

'Evidently,' said Egon. 'The trouble is, I'm not at all sure that we can attack the entity without putting Roland in mortal danger. If we fire our proton beams at the spire, the effect will be very much the same as if it gets struck by lightning.'

'Can't we just direct a trap beam up there?' Kylie wondered. 'You managed to trap it before, Egon, remember?'

'Yes, so I did,' Egon agreed. 'Very well, try that.'

Kylie reached for her trap, opened it and directed the beam upwards. At that moment several forks of lightning split the sky overhead; the trap fizzled and sparked, and Kylie dropped it with a shrill cry.

'The high level of static electricity in the air is interfering with the containment field,' Egon stated. 'And that lightning was alarmingly close to striking this building.'

'Yes!' the voice of the entity screeched overhead. 'It's coming closer – I can feel it! Now I, Daimar the Demon, King of the Dark Dimension, shall cross over into the world of men at last... and I shall rule!'

'Egon, what can we do?' Kylie asked desperately.

'Um...' said Egon. 'I don't know. I seem to be heading toward losing the capacity for rational thought, I'm afraid. The trouble is, we can't do anything to that demon while both he and Roland are wrapped around that pole, and he knows it!'

'Wait... I'm remembering something,' said Garrett. 'Something that might be useful here... something about a book...'

'Don't strain your brain too hard, man,' Eduardo advised.

'Shh, I'm trying to think!' Garrett shot back. 'Ah, yes, I know! Remember how we defeated the Vathack? Roland, drop the book!'

'Yes, of course!' said Egon. 'Quickly, Roland, throw it down here!'

'I... I... I can't!' Roland yelled back.

'You can do it, Roland!' Kylie yelled. 'Drop the book!'

'Just drop it, man!' Eduardo squealed.

'Roland, this time you have to make the choice that you know is right!' Egon encouraged him. 'You are in control of your own life – you're in control of whether you transfer to Stanford, and you're in control of whether you end up fried to a fritter on top of the Empire State Building! This time, there _is_ a right answer – throw us the book!'

'Think of all the reasons you want to stay in New York – your home, your family... us!' Kylie added. 'And think of all the reasons you want to go to California – your education, your future! You'll never get to make that choice for yourself if you choose right now to let Daimar the Demon sacrifice your life for his own evil ends! Drop the book!'

'You can do it, man!' Eduardo yelled.

'Come on, Roland, don't be such a wuss!' Garrett added. 'What would T'Keysha or T'Meyah or K'Deysha think of you now, huh?'

'I... I... I...' Roland yelled over the cacophony of the storm. 'I... I _can_ do it!'

He hurled the book away from him with some force; four proton streams rushed to intercept it before it had fallen more than ten metres. Daimar the Demon began to writhe and scream as the book was blown to smithereens.

'Stop them, Roland, stop them!' the entity screamed in desperation. 'Think of your new life – only I can give you what you want! The world of commercial engineering will be an open book to you! Everyone will want to be your friend! You can have any girl you want – you don't have to stop at just that one, and she's too clingy anyway! Don't let them do this to me, Roland – don't let them do it to _us_! We can be the ultimate team – we can rule the world!'

'I rule my own world, Daimar the Demon!' Roland yelled back defiantly. 'And I don't need your help to do it!'

At that moment, the book exploded spectacularly and the Ghostbusters switched off their proton streams. Daimar the Demon dissolved first into the guise of Professor Gerald Gaubert, then the crotchety old librarian who had directed Roland to the book, and then into a blue mist which gradually dissipated into the ether. Roland quickly slid down to join his friends; Egon and Eduardo were ready to help him carefully onto the observation platform and steady him on his feet.

'Wow, guys, I... I don't know what to... thanks, guys,' Roland smiled round at his companions.

'Don't sweat it,' said Garrett. 'That's what friends are for, right?'

'It's a shame you had to destroy the book,' Roland remarked.

'Hey, it was evil, man!' said Eduardo.

'I know,' Roland sighed. 'It's just that it was a library book. I'll get fined a fortune!'

'It wasn't a library book, Roland,' Kylie explained patiently. 'Daimar the Demon set you up. That library doesn't actually stock any of the books on your reading list – we checked. They suggested you try the main library in Manhattan.'

'Man, I wish I'd thought of that,' Roland remarked.

* * *

Roland entered the lounge at the firehouse, threw himself into a chair, and beamed contentedly at his fellow Ghostbusters.

'I've just given Professor Banks my answer about Stanford,' he announced proudly, 'and I didn't need any haunted books to help me do it!'

'It's just like J.K. Rowling says in _Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets_ ,' said Eduardo. 'Never trust something that thinks for itself if you can't see where it keeps its brain.'

'Oh, that's where that's from?' said Roland.

'It's good advice,' said Kylie. 'Maybe you're right about _Harry Potter_ , Eduardo – I'm definitely going to read those books.'

'I'll lend them both to you tomorrow if you want,' said Eduardo. 'It's like I've always said, Kylie – you really need to read more.'

'So what did you decide, Rolster?' asked Garrett.

'I've decided to defer for a year,' said Roland, 'and see how I feel then.'

'Talk about having your cake and eating it,' laughed Eduardo. 'You've made your choice, but you _haven't_ made your choice. You'll have to decide eventually, man.'

'I already have – I've decided to wait, and that's the right decision for me, right now!'

'Yeah, well... you know what I mean.'

'Well, I'm just glad to hear that you're not leaving us, Roland,' Kylie said warmly. 'Like I said before, you're our lynchpin, our earth wire, our keystone...'

'Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're all glad you're sticking around, big guy,' Garrett cut in. 'But what about T'Keysha or T'Meyah or K'Deysha, huh? Are you gonna see her again?'

'Oh,' said Roland, smiling slightly, 'I might.'


End file.
